Today confirmed the urinary retention is real, ongoing, and unresolved. Disappointing emotionally, but finally moving toward proper investigation and answers.
The night before urology: uncertainty, exhaustion, hope the catheter might come out, and fear that things may not be simple.
Adjusting to catheter life, disrupted sleep, exhaustion, and reduced capacity whilst trying to stay patient, practical, and emotionally steady day-to-day.

Everything is measured now: sleep, pain, urine, time, control. Life narrowed to tubes, drainage, exhaustion, and quiet adjustment.
A rapid collapse into scans, catheterisation, exhaustion, fear, and uncertainty — while still trying to adapt, function, and endure daily life.
Admitted with worsening leg numbness, urinary retention, eGFR 29, catheterisation, MRI investigation, and ongoing neurological and urological follow-up needs.

“Sleep apnoea leaves me exhausted, but after yesterday’s nurse call I’m persevering with the new CPAP mask and hopeful again.”

Sometimes something just pops in your head and this popped into mine!
Seeking stability, recovery, and peace rather than luxury; building a calmer life while quietly helping others through honest shared experience.
Depression, pain and exhaustion pulled me away from Aimless. I haven’t disappeared completely. I’ve simply been struggling to exist.

I’m from the UK — living with pain and mental illness, sharing my journals and fragments to show what it really looks like to keep going.