Negative times
Sometimes you cannot just put a brave face on it
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Life masured in Millilitres
Everything is measured now: sleep, pain, urine, time, control. Life narrowed to tubes, drainage, exhaustion, and quiet adjustment.
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Fighting Fears with My Tears: The Night Everything Spilled Over
A rapid collapse into scans, catheterisation, exhaustion, fear, and uncertainty — while still trying to adapt, function, and endure daily life.
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Astray
Depression, pain and exhaustion pulled me away from Aimless. I haven’t disappeared completely. I’ve simply been struggling to exist.
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Raw Poem of Wakefulness
The narrator experiences relentless, burdensome existence each morning, yearning for peace and an escape from life’s monotonous obligations.
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Cannot
A really bad day brings negativity on a huge scale. No joy in posting but an important record
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Some words from the night
A repetitive expression of the desire to distance oneself from various forms of travel and connection.
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The Fear of Today
The narrator reflects on returning powerful medication, experiencing fear of withdrawal but also a sense of resistance and control.
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Exhausted
Archive piece: exhausted mind admitting hidden suicidal thoughts, fearing burdening loved ones, feeling unseen and unheard while hope quietly fades.
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Will Lamotrigine stop me killing myself or others?
A person reflects on the impact of lithium on kidney health while questioning the effectiveness of lamotrigine for bipolar disorder management.
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Why Falling Could Be More Complex Than You Think
The author reflects on frequent falls, pain management with medication, and criticises others’ unsolicited advice on personal experiences.
Aimless
I’m from the UK — living with pain and mental illness, sharing my journals and fragments to show what it really looks like to keep going.